Rest in Peace

I have never really been close to my second cousin, Carol.  I think mostly because of distance.  She grew up in southern Illinois and then moved to Florida.  I grew up in central Illinois and the distance was just too far to have a close relationship.  But when we got together, I really enjoyed spending time and we had a lot of fun.  She is sweet and kind and considerate.  And she has a good sense of humor. Distance continues to be a hindrance even today.  Carol lives in Denver.  I live in Nashville.

On Wednesday, April 13th, Carol's 19 year-old daughter passed away.  My heart aches for Carol and her family.  What do you say to a mother of a 19 year-old that has died?  What can you say positive about a young adult that is just starting to make her way in life and then suddenly has it tragically ended? I don't know.  Cliches come to mind and only seem to ring hollow.  And the funeral service most certainly will be terribly difficult. At times such as these, I believe we were created to mourn and to cry.  At times like these, I think we can only pray that God provides comfort, and peace, and strength for the future.

Funerals make me reflect.  I think about the life of the person for whom the funeral is taking place.  I think of loved ones that have passed.  And I often think of what I would want my funeral to be like.  Daniel Boone had a great ending to his life.  His family gathered around him for nearly two weeks.  They sang favorite songs, told stories about his life, told him how much they loved him, and then one night, with his family gathered around, passed in his sleep.  That's the way I would love to have my life end.  I want my funeral to be small.  My wife, my boys (and their families), a few friends, my siblings, and Dad and Mom (Shirl), and my mother would be just fine for me.  At my funeral, I want to leave letters that are read to these people to let them know one final time how much I loved them.  I would hope that could say that my life was about helping them.  I would hope that they would know that I sacrificed some part of my life for them, and for me, it was completely worth it.  I would hope that they could say that in some small way I had challenged them to be a better person.

I can't say that I know Carol's daughter.  I have spent time with her only a few times. But, when we did spend time together, she was sweet and kind, just like her mother.  And I am sure that at her funeral, family and friends will know that she loved them and that she made a difference in their lives.

Rest in peace Allison.  Rest in peace sweet young lady.