Seasons End

The leaves are falling like snow today.  Leaves have accumulated on the ground and half of the trees are mostly barren.  It's definitely autumn and it seems like just yesterday that I was dealing with extreme heat.  But there is no stopping the seasons in nature.  I think it is the same way with the seasons of our lives.

Just as summer ends, so must some relationships, business and personal.  In his book, Necessary Endings, Dr. Henry Cloud states that, "Growth itself demands that we move on.  Without the ability to end things, people stay stuck, never becoming who they are meant to be, never accomplishing all that their talents and abilities afford them".  Both of my boys are figuring this out.  They are learning what they like and don't like in regards to traits and beliefs in a future spouse .  They are also learning that it is sometimes necessary to end relationships so that they can grow more personally before engaging in the complexities of dating.  They are learning what means the most to them and what they are willing to take a stand for in regards to spiritual, physical, and relational issues.  Dr. Cloud also makes a good point when he says, "A breakup, an ending of some friendships or activities, or an unplugging from some commitments, often signal the beginning of a whole new life."

In business, endings also can signal positive new "life".  Whether it means giving up a certain product or an entire division to realize higher profit margins, the change can be exactly what is needed for growth or to stop a downward spiral.  Sometimes a business has to end a relationship with an employee in order to grow and bring stability back to the company.  Chances are, if the employee is causing problems, the ending can be a new start for them elsewhere where they are happier and more productive also. Sometimes a business has to end a relationship (not necessarily firing) to get to the next level.

In regards to personal issues, it is often the case that people get stuck in bad situations or relationships that are harmful, that hold a person back, or that can be abusive mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  These relationships must be ended.  Sometimes, it is not a relationship that needs to end but a behavior.  "In many contexts, until we let go of what is not good, we will never find something that is good.  The lesson: good cannot begin until bad ends" (Necesarry Endings)

Endings are a part of life.  But they are also a pre-requisite for thriving personally and professionally.  I explained to Josh yesterday that everyone has had a relationship end.  It is the reason that I did not marry my first Homecoming date.  It is the reason that I don't still deliver papers on Ehrett Street in Creve Coeur, Illinois.  But I took positive things from my first Homecoming date and I learned discipline delivering papers in brutal Illinois snow storms.

For some reason, we are taught to dislike endings.  We are usually not well-equipped to handle them.  But really, proper perspective is a good first step to handling endings well.  "When done well, the seasons of life are negotiated, and the proper endings lead to the end of pain, greater growth, personal and business goals reached, and better lives.  Endings bring hope".

I am hopeful!!